Our perceptual position has a huge impact on our lives, and in any discussion, two people looking at the same topic from different sides could totally disagree about reality simply because they have different perspectives. And sometimes, looking at things from someone else’s perspective can provide us with new insights. Most people who know me, are aware of my ongoing quest to understand religion and its effect on people’s inner peace/joy. And in a recent discussion about this, a religious friend introduced me to a new insight which, ironically, has nothing to do with religion.
To make his point about blind “belief”, the friend asked, “why do you accept that setting goals is important? And why is ambition paraded as a virtue when it seems to, on the most part, fuel people into crossing ethical boundaries?”. The rest of that encounter is left for your curiosity to ponder. But...
That night, I spent some time giving serious consideration to the question of “why?”. Why do we take for granted the largely unchallenged dogma of setting goals? Particularly when most goals are dissatisfied widows living in the neglected retirement home of our own subconscious.
Goal setter would argue that statistically speaking, setting a SMART goal largely increases the chances of achieving a positive outcome in one’s life. This is as convincing as the argument that “you’ve got to be in to win” when talking about Lotto, but since we’re on the topic of statistics, why do we chose to ignore the statistic that suggests most goals fail to achieve fruition (the numbers vary from 60% to 90% depending on who you ask)
In fact, many argue that failure to achieve a goal is the most effective mode of transport from Motivation Road to Depression Land. And I would bet that everyone reading this has had at least one encounter with such a failure.
So why do we insist on insanity? Honestly, I don’t know. I simply “feel” that it works. I don’t care what statistics say. I guess there might be some sense in religion after-all.
From my own experience though, I believe that setting goals in the future (which is what most people do) isn’t the best. I believe goals need be set in a way to have a positive impact on our life NOW.
Also, those who achieve their goals regularly agree that rephrasing goals as affirmations has increased the chances of success by all accounts. (example: You could set a goal to make a million dollars in 10 years, or you could say “I live a rich life, and I act in a way that drives me a step closer, every day, to my million dollar destination”, or maybe you could do both!)
Another important factor in goal setting, is to ensure that achieving the goal is congruent with your identity, your values and your personal beliefs. There’s no point aiming to be rich when you also believe that wealth corrupts the soul, just as it’s crazy to set a goal of becoming the next Donald Trump when you are at your core a socialist.
So pull out your written goals and make sure you adjust them with these tips in mind. Who knows, you might actually achieve more of them.
Maybe next blog, I’ll share my thoughts on the whole thing about “why ambition is a virtue”
Got any other good goal setting tips?
Ps. I’m assuming you all know the difference between “goals” and “SMART goals”
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